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'The alien self is present in all of us, because transient neglect is part of ordinary caregiving; it is pernicious when later experiences of trauma in the family or the peer group force the child to dissociate from pain by using the alien self to identify with the aggressor. Hence, the vacuous self comes to be colonized by the image of the aggressor, and the child comes to experience himself as evil and monstrous'

 

Fonagy, P. (2004). Affect regulation, mentalization and the development of the self. London: Karnac.

 

 


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